Why Do I Feel Like I’m Not Enough? A Therapist’s Guide to Rebuilding Self-Worth
“You don’t have to do more to be worthy. Worthiness isn't earned, it's remembered”
You try your best. You show up. You give your all. But deep down, there’s a persistent whisper that says, "It’s still not enough."
As a therapist, I hear this from clients all the time. It's a quiet ache that follows them into relationships, work, and even moments of rest. This feeling of not being "enough" isn't a personal failing—it's often a symptom of deeper emotional wounds that need acknowledgment, not shame.
What Causes the "Not Enough" Feeling?
Early attachment wounds or emotional neglect
Perfectionism and internalized expectations
Trauma that led to self-protective beliefs
Cultural messaging that ties worth to productivity or appearance
These beliefs often settle in during childhood or adolescence, shaping a distorted mirror of your identity.
Signs You Might Be Struggling With Low Self-Worth
Constantly comparing yourself to others
Difficulty accepting compliments or achievements
Fear of rejection or failure
Over-functioning in relationships to prove your value
How Therapy Helps You Rebuild Worth Therapy offers a safe space to explore where those beliefs came from, and what parts of you still carry that fear. I often use psychodynamic and inner child work to help clients reparent those wounded parts. We also integrate practical tools like:
Self-compassion practices
Identifying and rewriting core beliefs
Somatic grounding to embody new narratives
Small Shifts That Make a Big Impact
Practice naming the voice of the inner critic, and separating from it
Keep a "proof of worth" journal: moments where your presence made a difference
Speak to yourself the way you would speak to someone you love
You don’t have to do more to be worthy. Worthiness isn't earned, it's remembered. And healing begins the moment you decide to get curious about the story underneath "I'm not enough."
If this resonates, you might benefit from therapy centered around self-worth and healing. I offer individual therapy across Ontario and walk & talk sessions in Toronto. Learn more here.